Normally, we do not so much look at things as overlook them. — Alan Watts.

Regardless if you are a stay at home parent, work outside the home, single or in a relationship, the time and emotional pressures to set aside space and time for oneself remains the similar.



Our society and culture is addicted to being busy with the pace and demands on personal time and space becoming greater as the months go by.

We all draw upon a reserve, often referred to as the emotional or creative well to share our love, nurturing and self expression with the world. The levels within this well is reflected in the happiness and wellbeing of a person.

Women; mothers especially, are often drawing upon this well constantly and never have the opportunity to stop or refill. Burn out, resentment, frustration and emotional swings are all key signs that the emotional well is running on dry.

A list of simple pleasures is a good way to begin reclaiming back your space in tiny manageable pieces. Simple pleasures don’t need to have huge investments of time, energy, money or effort in order for them to be effective or worthwhile. Most find that they can indulge in their simple pleasures without having to worry about having someone care for their children; or to take time away from their projects or heavy work loads, but for one reason or another simply don’t.

We are all guilty of “busyness” the act of forgetting to stop… and breathe.. and think about the little things.

My challenge to you is not to overlook the simple pleasures in your life which you can indulge in every day.

In doing this, you will begin to refill that emotional well in which you need to draw upon to gift your love, your creative spirit and your energy with those around you. Post a list in a prominent part of your home which will remind not only yourself that this personal time and space is important but others in your home as well. Children, even as young as a toddler can join in and note the very special things that they like to do which makes them feel peaceful and happy.

Recognizing, and giving thanks, for these routines and rituals is all part of the ongoing process of claiming back your space.

Something that everyone, no matter who they are or what they do, can undertake to find happiness is to truly live in the moment of whatever they are doing. This is sometimes called mindfulness and is overlooked by a large percentage of the population as a major key in distressing and calming down.



Being in the moment while you hold your partners hand, look at the in the eye or speak with your child, give full attention to the task at hand; allowing nothing else to distract or detract from being totally present and open to the other person.

There is no other higher gift you can give to another than your total attention and presence. With activities too, mindfulness will allow you to be more accurate, enjoy and appreciate it to a higher extend and in most cases, allow you to be speedier or more efficient in completing it. There’s no one better at being present than a child – they are totally focused on what they are doing right now.

Watch them playing with a toy and see that they are not thinking of anything but what is happening in front of them. If you have ever lost yourself in a task, a hobby, in some sports game or a housework type chore where you concentrated on it totally, where everything slipped into place and where the world disappeared, then you have experienced a feeling of ‘being in the flow” or being totally present or mindful.

It would be a saintly person who could live in this state for extended amounts of time, so for we normal folk, the challenge would be to be mindful with one or two tasks a day – and to see what a difference that made to your state of mind and stress levels.

Capture a few simple pleasures such as wearing your favourite perfume or jewellery, laying back and watching the stars one night, walking barefoot in the grass, holding hands with someone you love and being in that moment, read a chapter of a book - alone, allow yourself to play in water – it holds a fascination for people of all ages – just watch children in a puddle!, picking up your embroidery, crochet or knighting and finishing a section, catching up with some friends on facebook, the possibilities are endless!

What are your simple pleasures?

See if you can stop at only ten.

I’ll start with some of my indulgent simple pleasures – the things I can do at home with my kids around and still feel special and nurtured.

I would encourage you to contribute or suggest your own and perhaps write them up on a nice piece of parchment and pin it somewhere you will see on a regular basis ( kitchen or in the bathroom) – just to remind yourself to stop and refill and recharge.

• Fresh berries picked from the vine and popped straight into your mouth
• Reading short stories online – blogs and websites I find while surfing
• Reading, snuggled up on my chaise lounge with a hot chocolate at hand
• Wrestling in bed with my two kids, hearing them laugh and giggle
• Playing my music loud – when I am at home alone
• A block of Lindt chocolate – eaten one morsel at a time
• Freshly popped popcorn in front of a good movie
• Fresh flowers in my home

• Enjoying a cup of tea in my fine china cups
• Flying kites with my family
• Freshly brewed coffee – drunk while hot – from a funky mug
• Sharing a spider with my kids ( a soda float, icecream float) and giggling
• Writing a card or note to a friend using a fountain pen and coloured ink
• Feeling the breeze on your face while walking
• Winding the windows down in the car and letting your hair get messed up.
• Laying back and looking at the clouds, making up stories and characters with the shapes.
• Call a good friend, tell them a joke and then say goodbye.
• Sketch something in front of me – just with a biro pen on the back of an envelope.
• Carving an apple bird and then help my kids demolish it.
• Sitting and enjoying a kids cartoon with my kids.

One of the greatest simple pleasures comes from the feeling of self accomplishment you get when you finish what you started.

If you are like so many other people addicted to being busy, you will have a dozen – if not more projects which have been started and for excellent reasons, just never finished.

There is a great amount of hidden stress attached to these unfinished masterpieces. Set them out and practice your mindfulness, deciding which project to finish first, ask for help if its needed – and just do it… then celebrate.

Drinking a cup of tea in a beautiful china cup while its still hot, reading the morning paper while its still morning, spraying on perfume, doing a crossword or chatting on the phone uninterrupted, having a deep bubbly bath with some music playing or dancing in the lounge room… the list is endless.



What are some of the simple pleasures you can indulge in right now?

What small things could make you feel truly pampered, refreshed and recharged?

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